Here is one of quite a few videos I found to give you an idea of what I'll be doing when I get my tea party on. The napkin folding part might take me a half hour, so I hope my guests are patient types.
One thing the video doesn't show is the offering of sweets ("wagashi") before the tea. They are placed on a lacquered tray, for the guests to enjoy while the host is preparing his or her ceremony. I found a place in NYC that makes these traditional (and gorgeous) Japanese sweets, which look something like this: